I must express the way it feels to ride all day

without a care, conversation and a coffee

I wanna talk about the good things in my life

I wanna try to be alright

I can care about the way love makes me feel

I can care about the good things that are real

I don’t wanna have to think about the ways that I’m so bad

I don’t wanna have to think about the things that make me sad

Do I

Do I

there are things that make me smile every day

the jokes we play, the funny things we say

there is nothing like the joy they can see in my eyes

when i think about the man in my life

I can care about the way he makes me feel

I can care because his love makes me feel real

I don’t wanna have to think about the ways that we’ll be bad

I don’t wanna think about the days that we’ll be sad

Do I

Do I

Do I

(Well I don’t wanna have to think about it)

Swift as a wind song
You sang the music of an honest bird
I waited for some contradiction
But truth was ringing in your every word

And every moment since then
The one thing I can tell
Is that I belong with you
And no one else

Lay down those heavy burdens
On the banks of this river deep
Know that every piece of your past
Is always some place safe with me

And there’s no room for judgment
I want you as yourself
Cuz I belong with you
And no one else

We have both been broken
Bent into painful shapes
We almost let those old fears
Carry over and get in our way
Every struggle just makes our love get stronger
Than it was yesterday

So here we are now
Ain’t it lucky we survived it all
Searching for self in separate rivers
Ending up in the same waterfall

And when we’re gray and wiser
The story I will tell
Is that I belonged with you
And no one else

basically i’m complicated
i have a hard time taking the easy way
i wouldn’t call it schitzophrenia
but i’ll be at least 2 people today

if that’s ok

and i could go on and on and on
but who cares

its deep how you can be so shallow
and i’m afraid cause i have no fear
and i didn’t believe in magic
until i watched you disappear

i wish you were here

and i could go on and on and on
but who cares

you see everybody is somebody
but nobody wants to be themselves
and if i ever wanted to understand me
i’d have to talk to someone else

cause every little bit helps

and i could go on and on and on
but who cares

it feels like
the surreal life
but its still nice
wish i could live twice
and i still might
if these won’t heal right
i see a little light
even though its still night
(repeat)

and i could go on and on and on
but who cares

Hey love
May I have a word with you?
I’d like to tell you, yeah
Just what I’ve been going through
My nights are so long
As I watch each hour go by
Hoping and praying
That someday I will be your guy

Hey love
You’re my one true soul desire
Hey love, baby
Can you feel this burning fire

Hey love
There’s one thing I find so true
When you are near me
I go through a change or two
Hearing your footsteps
I hurry to catch your eye
And I stand there waiting, yeah
But girl, you just walk on by

Say love
With a cold heart you are dealing
Hey love, yeah
It’s an awful hurting feeling

Hey love
Don’t pass me without some sign
Just look me over, yeah
You might want to change your mind

I know I’m scarce, but I had to share this picture. I had to work a couple of hours over last night. By the time I got out of here, it was getting dark so I chose to take a cab to the train station. Tell my why bruh-man had tv’s in the cab, playing a dvd of videos! In this pic, check out “Lean with it, Rock with it”. After a hearty laugh, I asked the enterprising gentleman what the deal was with the tv’s and the Vibe magazines and such. He told me “Some people go a long way, they need to be entertained”. So I asked him for a bottle of water. He looked at me crazy. I told him that when I used to take a towncar service to work, they used to provide all of the daily newspapers along with water and coffee. “So where’s my water?” “Sorry Miss, you don’t get water on a $3.00 fare”. Damn. L

1st Verse (Lyfe):
What if I broke our monogamous agreement
What if I told you I lied but didn’t mean it
What if my one mistake
had the potential to break
up our happy home
Would you wanna know
What if I confessed it and though she didn’t mean nothing since it happened
You’re thinking about leaving
What if I suppressed it
and made a vow to never mess with another
Is it cool for me to smother the facts
Is it cool for me to cover my tracks
if you’d never know
Or would me not being honest hurt you more

Chorus:
Hypothetically of course
Are there some things better left unsaid
Or would you wanna know instead
Hypothetically of course
Are there some wars not worth fighting
Some tears not worth crying out
Hypothetically of course
What if this happened to you
what would you want me to do

2nd Verse (Fantasia):
Well what if I told you that I had a confession
What if I said four years ago when we were arguing
he came to comfort me and I wound up pregnant
And I just can’t say for sure
if the baby’s yours
What if I confessed it and it turns out not to be your baby after you get tested
And it destroys what we’ve been blessed with
What if I suppress it ‘cause technically you’re the baby’s daddy anyway
Is it wrong for me to want you to stay
Would you rather have me tear you away
From the only, family you know
Or is this just too big a secret to keep it on the low

Chorus:
Hypothetically of course
Are there some things better left unsaid
Or would you wanna know instead
Hypothetically of course
Are there some wars not worth fighting
Some tears not worth crying out
Hypothetically of course
What if this happened to you
what would you want me to do

Chorus/Bridge:
Would you wanna know
Would you wanna know
Tell me what you’d do
Would you walk away or would you stay
Would you wanna know
Would you wanna leave the past behind us
Or are you afraid that one day it might find us
Would it even matter
Could it even matter
Should it even matter
Hypothetically of course

everyone knows that Tif and I subscribe to a rack of magazines. we used to have a glass coffee table with a crack in it. in a stroke of creativity, we started covering the entire table with all of our magazines to cover the crack. it became apparent that our friends detested the magazine collection, but in an act of solidarity we basically said “fine, stay the hell out of our apartment, and you won’t be subjected to it.” needless to say, most folks shut up talking.
but now we’ve moved on up farther towards the east side. new glass coffee table, same old magazine delimma. Tif keeps the Maxim’s, because when you put an entire year together, the spines form a picture of some half nekkid white girl. i keep the Essence’s because i figure they’ll probably be worth something some day. (we used to know this person that had a huge collection of very old Ebony’s. too bad she was a trick, mighta helped her sell them. L now watch her or her minions sneak and read this blog and cackle about that comment for weeks. love it!) but what the heck should we do with the old FHM’s, Glamour, Cosmo (burn it!), Kiplinger’s, Black Enterprise, Vanity Fair, Rolling Stones, etc?

Anybody got any ideas?

[Big Pimpin]
I have pimped my pen, on cold Michigan nights
and the bitch didn’t freeze up on me, when I wanted her to write it
I have pimped my pen in the hot California sun
and the bitch didn’t drip, smell, or run
as she turned the trick pages, from looseleaf to zig-zags
I have pimped my pen and she is number one in my stable
for I have yet not got a refill, for her
I love her that’s why she keeps, performing for me
I have pimped my pen… and she is number one, in my stable
Pleasure, is the treasure that the girl sells all day
Pleasure is the reason that she brings daddy his pay
Dedicated the hoe, dedicate for sure
Dripping willows on satin pillows
Love is being checked, from a hoe
Dead presidents still getting their fuck on
I’m so happy because ain’t nothing like a lollipop
that gets sucked, ALL day long
A tangy, little candy drop
I love it when she brings me the pay
Dedicated like everyday… to the sunshine
Yeah my hoe brings me mine
For life she says she’d do it
And I believed her when I accept it
Yeah I got pimp bones in my body
and I rock them, like la-di-da-di
I rock them, mighty hardy, like la-di-da-di
I got pimp bones in my body

*yawn and stretch*

finally! we’re back in business. in the event that you didn’t know and you care, the EverythingSoul blog family has been HURTING for the last month. see, Tif , the quentissential Biggie fan, put up an audio tribute to Biggie on March 9th. The kind folks over at AllHipHop.com put up a link to his tribute generating major traffic to his blog. As a result, the bastards that own our web hosting SHUT.IT.DOWN. Ever since its been almost impossible for even us to access our own blogs. Repeated inquiries to the host just served to piss us the hell off. Either they denied noticing any difference in our response time or they suggested that we pay them more money for better serivce. Da hell?

Welp, as many many mofos have discovered over the years, you can’t eff with a black girl with a credit card and ws-ftp. One thing black folks know how to do is leave some shit. Bye bye Doteasy. Hello Dreamhost. It took about 24 hours for the entire switch, a drop in the bucket considering all of the downtime that we’ve had. Plus, when I wrote them mofos at DE and told them we were leaving they had the audacity to ask why. Check your email bruh.

But don’t get to comfortable DreamHost. I’m taking you up on your 97 day money back guarantee on a terabyte (TB) of bandwidth. I’m known for picking up and changing cities. I have no problem with developing a reputation for hosting em and leaving em.

P.S. DreamHost claims to have this hellafied referral program. *shrug* They say they give you $97 for each person that you refer that signs up. Well, out of my $97 reward I’m giving away between $30 and $77, depending on the plan you sign up for. *shrug* What do I have to lose? At least my website works now. LOL Checkout DreamHost. Use promocode “GIMME” for my heckafied discount.

i am a terrible person….but of course you know that. whatever couple of a few readers that i mighta have have surely abondoned me cause i’m so lazy that i can’t update my blog on a regular basis. i’m going to get better, really i am. in the meantime i gotta do this recap thing again. as if you care. sigh

Thusday, 2/23 was SUPER STYLEWARZ!! I always have such a great time. Congratulations to EJ on his SUPER win. (I am soooo corny, but at least I know it.)

Friday, 2/24th I meant to write about Amazon Prime and ask folks to help me debate on whether I should put out the $79 for a year of free 2 day shipping. But I couldn’t get a few minute to write that post. I did take a free minute to cancel that shit tho.

Monday, 2/27th was my older brother’s, (read: cousin) 40th Birthday. Jeez man. Stop aging!

Sunday 3/5 was a pretty perfect day. We had the season’s first “Sunday Social” at our house. Food, folks, and fun. Nothing like a good “the problem with black men/women/relationships” argument over crabs and wine. Later that night Three 6 Mafia made history and did the M-town proud by winning the Oscar for Best Original Song. I’m not sure what was better, the fact that they won the Academy Award or the fact that those hater northern hip hop heads have to suck that shit up and watch America rain accolades on Southern Rap. Just like Dave Chappelle made it ok to refer to folks as “bitches”, Three 6 has stuck the word “pimp” right smack in the middle of right white vernacular. Love it!

Tuesday, 3/7 was Tif and my 5 year anniversary!! I know, that’s like, forever right? Happy Anniversary to my honey and thanks for a great night. (Really honey, we should look up the actual rules to strip poker before next year. Isn’t there some bluffing involved or something?)

This weekend my mother and sister will be visiting from Memphis. They’ll get a presenation on Tif’s dream wedding plans, a tour of the requisite tourist attractions and a little something I like to call “Shoe Shopping Marathon!” WWHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOO (It amazes me how girly I’ve become in the past couple of years.)